A little taste:
"A severed foot is the ultimate stocking stuffer."
"I haven't slept for ten days, because that would be too long."
"I wish I could play little league now, I'd kick some fuckin' ass."
"You don't have to be sweaty and holding a basketball to drink Gatorade. What if you are just a thirsty dude? Gatorade seems to forget about this demographic."
"I'm an ice sculptor - last night I made a cube."
"Tony the Tiger thinks shit is great. Thats all I got. I ordered two little boxes of frosted flakes for room service, it cost $37.50! On the box Tony the Tiger was going 'They're fffffucking expensive!'"
"Sometimes I wave to people I don't know. It's very dangerous to wave to someone you don't know because, what if they don't have a hand? They'll think you're cocky. 'Look what I got motherfucker! This thing is useful. I'm gonna go pick something up!'"
Check him out on YouTube:
This video is definitely worth your time
Don't forget to test the poll in the upper right for me by voting. It's anonymous, so chill. People won't think you're weird.
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