All art is quite useless.

The artist is the creator of beautiful things.
To reveal art and conceal the artist is art's aim.
The critic is he who can translate into another manner
or a new material his impression of beautiful things.
The highest, as the lowest, form of criticism is a mode
of autobiography.
Those who find ugly meanings in beautiful things are corrupt
without being charming. This is a fault.
Those who find beautiful meanings in beautiful things
are the cultivated. For these there is hope.
They are the elect to whom beautiful things means only Beauty.
There is no such thing as a moral or an immoral book.
Books are well written, or badly written. That is all.
The nineteenth century dislike of Realism is the rage of
Caliban seeing his own face in a glass.
The nineteenth century dislike of Romanticism is the
rage of Caliban not seeing his own face in a glass.
The moral life of man forms part of the subject-matter of
the artist, but the morality of art consists in the perfect
use of an imperfect medium. No artist desires to prove
anything. Even things that are true can be proved.
No artist has ethical sympathies. An ethical sympathy
in an artist is an unpardonable mannerism of style.
No artist is ever morbid. The artist can express everything.
Thought and language are to the artist instruments of an art.
Vice and virtue are to the artist materials for an art.
From the point of view of form, the type of all the arts is
the art of the musician. From the point of view of feeling,
the actor's craft is the type.
All art is at once surface and symbol.
Those who go beneath the surface do so at their peril.
Those who read the symbol do so at their peril.
It is the spectator, and not life, that art really mirrors.
Diversity of opinion about a work of art shows that the work
is new, complex, and vital.
When critics disagree the artist is in accord with himself.
We can forgive a man for making a useful thing as long as he
does not admire it. The only excuse for making a useless
thing is that one admires it intensely.
All art is quite useless.

- Oscar Wilde

Crap. It's August.

Totally had a dream within a dream last night. Crazy stuff.

I wonder who the first person was that, after tasting alcohol, decided to keep drinking enough of that sh*t to get a pleasant side-effect and tell all his (I'm assuming it was a man) friends to give it a shot. (bad pun intended)

I wonder who the first person was to find out that kissing feels good.

I wonder who the first person was to say, "This will be the year 1!"

I wonder who the first person was to create sand boobs for their buried friend at the beach.

Sometimes it's hard to remember a relative's age, even a sibling. Unless they were born in the year 2000. Then I'm pretty good at remembering.

Is it weird that I find it weird that people have birthdays after the year 2000? I can't imagine writing a birthday like "6/21/00" or even "01" or "02." I had to register for random forums for advertising for my internship, and to check if the user is of "suitable age" (13), you have to agree that you were born before July-whatever-date of 1997. Being born in '97 makes you qualified for something?! Goddamn. I feel old. It already feels weird to know I was born in the 80's. '89 shouldn't count.

Speaking of time, I think everyone should have a countdown clock constantly reminding them how much time they have left until they're, let's say 60 years old. I feel like it's harder to disregard time when you see it ticking down, and there's nothing you can do to stop it... People might be less inclined to waste it.

Anyway, I wonder who decided that there would be 60 seconds to a minute, 60 minutes to an hour, and 24 hours to a day.
Actually I kind of know. The word on the street says it was the Egyptians. They had a base-12 counting system and were the ones who invented the sundial. Instead of counting their 10 fingers, they used their thumbs to count the 3 creases where the joints are in each finger (12 on each hand). Since a sundial only works during the day, they only had 12 units (hours) to the day, so to get a full cycle of day and night, we just have to double that number to get 24.
Betcha didn't know THAT.


//edit:
What I wrote above was from what I remember learning a while ago, but I found an article that seems to explain it better. I'm just speculating though, I'm too lazy to actually read the article right now, but here it is for all the nerds like me out there:
Why are there 60 mins in an hour?

Books

Reading is good. I'm will finish all of these books by the end of the summer.

Sophie's World: DONE!
Acts of Faith: DONE!
Thus Spoke Zarathustra: in progress
A. Lincoln: in progress
Malcolm X: almost done!
Oscar Wilde - the Major Works: in progress
Stem Cell Now: DONE!
The Prince: almost done!
Scarlet Letter: haven't started
Killing Pablo: haven't started

I can do it!

Apparently I'm a Fattist Idealist.

Came across this ridiculous article while doing research for my internship:
WALL-E's 'fattist' satire angers fat pride groups

"Fat pride"? Are you sh*tting me? Being proud to be fat is about as reasonable as being proud to be a diabetic. Or ugly. Or handicapped. Which are all pretty much side-effects of being a fat f*ck. I guess as a straight, white, (and non-overweight) male, it's hard for me to find sources of pride that are socially acceptable to express.
White pride? That's a no-no.
Straight pride? That's just odd.
Man pride? When does it end... we might as well all just be proud to be human. Hmm.

You know what, I hope that one day, aliens take over. Why? I'll tell you.
If I'm in SoCal and I come across someone workin' some Sharks/Giants/A's/Warriors/Niners/Raiders gear: instant connection.
If I'm at another school and I come across someone in UCLA attire: instant connection.
If I'm out of state and I meet someone from California: instant connection.
If I'm out of country and I meet another American: instant connection.
It doesn't even matter if we exchange a single word, I'll automatically feel a sense of camaraderie with this person. And you know you would too.
So now imagine we've been enslaved by aliens. Imagine how united we'd be. Every time you see another human, "What up, man!" So damn excited just to see another person. Hopefully the aliens will have a derogatory term for us, so we can bond over the word and eventually be the only ones allowed to use it. "Human Pride" wouldn't sound so retarded anymore.

Actually, I just realized: I guess it would be better if aliens TRIED to take over the world, but we dominated them and enslaved their alien asses. Dude... imagine unleashing Al-Qaeda, North Korea, all the genocidal maniacs in Africa, the sheer number of Chinese and Indian people, and the combined nuclear power of the world... ALL that sh*t directed at some unfortunate extraterrestrial b*tches. Team Humanity would put up a hell of a fight. And once we begin exploiting the aliens for cheap labor, we'd be too busy discriminating against them to hate on our own kind! What can I say, I'm an idealist.

And we could still have "Human Pride," just 'cause it's in our nature to be assholes.




‎"A lot of people have gaydar... I have fatdar. I can automatically tell if you're fat or not."
-Zach Galifianakis


P.S. I don't hate fat people. I just judge them. Watching a fatty chow down at McDonald's is like watching an asthmatic do this:

It just makes me angry and sad. And I'm mainly talking about those who are morbidly obese and bring a chair to lounge in while they wait in line at KFC for their family-sized bucket of popcorn chicken. But if you just got a little chub, I really don't care.

Good ideas.

First of all, I believe we should take over Canada and call it New Alaska. Why? Who cares. Because it'd be funny. F*ck you.


Next, how to create a hit pop song:
1. Awkwardly sing your own name, then auto-tune it a la "Jasoooon Derulooooo."
2. Take a retarded pick-up line and auto-tune it, a la "Call me Mr. Flintstone, I can make your bed rock!"
3. Repeat.

Example:
" ♪ Aleeexx Reicherrrrrt ♫ (I need more vowels in my name)
Is your name summer? 'Cause you're hott oooOOOoooOOO
'Cause you're so hott yeahh oooOOOoooOOO "


(Me, as soon as this shizz goes mainstream)



Lastly, a stereogram t-shirt! Amazing idea. Especially if you love having people intensely stare at you.
(Stare long enough, you'll see some birds or something:)

Imagine this. On your shirt! Or on the crotch area of your pants... "Stare long enough, you'll see something in 3D."

Rage. Road Rage.

It's a good thing James Bond doesn't get road rage. With cars like this, who knows what could happen...

"Asshole cut me off?! Eat lead, motherf*cker!!"

¡GOOOOOOOOOOOL!

Imagine how annoying watching basketball would be if the commentators got this excited every time there was a score...


World Cup is over. Back to caring even less about soccer.

La la la

It's going to suck to be a history major in 1000 years... so much more shit to learn. And primary sources from the 21st century will consist of twitter and stupid blogs. I guess with every passing year, being a historian gets a little bit more difficult.

I wonder how Mexico feels about New Mexico. We should rename Alaska "New Canada." And where is the original "Jersey"? or "Zealand"?

Dumb things I believed as a kid:
-that drinking milk would make my teeth whiter.
-that eating ice cream would make me feel warmer on a cold day because it would cool down the inside of my body and make the outside air seem relatively warmer.
-that "auspicious" was a typo for "suspicious" because "a" and "s" are so close on the keyboard

And this is why I think Kesha is a talentless, white-trash, shitty-version-of-Lady-Gaga who can do nothing but crap out "catchy" songs that appeal to the lowest common denominator:

What. The. F*ck...





I need to find a job.

Summer!

So I potentially have a lot of free time this summer. I guess I'll start updating more again!

OK so I haven't researched this at all, but I seriously don't understand the point of signing credit card receipts. You could change your signature each time and no one would give a crap. My signature has evolved (or degenerated) to look like a Richter scale graph, and I doubt there will be an ramifications. (I really love the word "ramifications," it's like a more badass way to say "consequences." I never say "consequences" anymore.)

And don't even get me started on the stupidity of those credit card touch screen signing pads... good god. Am I the only one whose signature ends up looking like a Rorschach inkblot?


I guess you can kinda make out the A and the R...

I should probably make some summer goals. Word on the street is that writing down your goals and saying them out loud makes you more likely to go through with them.
Goal #1: Think of more goals.


Happy Summer everyone!

Another boring post.

Too lazy to write anything original right now.

So anyway, Ben Franklin was pretty awesome. Aside from inventing a ton of shit and helping found the most powerful nation on the planet, he did a little writing as well ("A penny saved is a penny earned," "Failing to prepare is preparing to fail," "God helps those who help themselves." Ring any bells?). In his 20s he made a list of thirteen virtues that he felt were an important guide for living. These virtues can be divided into those related to personal behavior (temperance, order, resolution, frugality, moderation, industry, cleanliness, and tranquility) and those related to social character traits (sincerity, justice, silence, chastity, and humility). Take a look and consider what this guy has to say.

Benjamin Franklin's 13 virtues:

Temperance: Eat not to dullness; drink not to elevation.

Order: Let all your things have their places; let each part of your business have its time.

Resolution: Resolve to perform what you ought; perform without fail what you resolve.

Frugality: Make no expense but to do good to others or yourself; i.e., waste nothing.

Moderation: Avoid extremes; forbear resenting injuries so much as you think they deserve.

Industry: Lose no time; be always employed in something useful; cut off all unnecessary actions.

Cleanliness: Tolerate no uncleanliness in body, clothes, or habitation.

Tranquility: Be not disturbed at trifles, or at accidents common or unavoidable.

Silence: Speak not but what may benefit others or yourself; avoid trifling conversation.

Sincerity: Use no hurtful deceit; think innocently and justly, and, if you speak, speak accordingly.

Justice: Wrong none by doing injuries, or omitting the benefits that are your duty.

Chastity: Rarely use venery but for health or offspring, never to dullness, weakness, or the injury of your own or another's peace or reputation.

Humility: Imitate Jesus and Socrates.